Triggering the happier child by Zahra Akkerhuys

From the archive, first published Friday 23rd Nov 2001.

Many mothers say they can barely remember the early months of their child's life.

They pass in a hazy blur of sleepless nights, dirty nappies and sore nipples.

But while most new mothers find it a struggle to keep their eyes open, experts say the first 18 months are the most important of a person's life, and shape the way they will inter-act with people years down the line.

Oxford psychotherapist Sue Gerhardt, one of the founders of Oxford Parent-Infant Project, known as Oxpip, says a child's experiences during those formative years has a huge impact on not only an emotional, but also a physiological level.

There are few, if any, people who make the transition from being childless to being a parent smoothly. In an age where being a single parent is not unusual and, now that the extended family has virtually become extinct in many communities, more and more new parents are having to cope alone.

Oxpip, an Oxford-based charity, was set up to help fill the gap. The organisation, which has been running for more than three years, is set to expand after landing a National Lottery grant of nearly £181,000 last month.

It offers one-to-one counselling sessions for both mothers and fathers of infants under the age of two to help them cope with the enormous amount of change going on in their lives and to help them develop a crucial bond with their child.

Research, done by combined teams of neuroscientists and psychotherapists, shows the love given to an infant triggers a chemical reaction in the brain which generates endorphins, a group of hormones which make people happy.

These endorphins in turn release glucose, developing the part of the brain responsible for controlling emotion and helping a person respond to others in a social context, called the orbito-frontal cortex, located behind the eyes at the front of the brain.

Ms Gerhardt says: "It's all very technical but the loving, nurturing and warmth given by a parent to a child generates endorphins, which people usually associate with nice things that make them feel good, like chocolate.

"The development of this specific part of the brain is crucial to help a child become emotionally-literate, or emotionally-intelligent, to use a bit of jargon.

"It is very under-developed in children in Romanian orphanages, for example, because they do not receive the love and attention they so need.

"Certainly the more warmth and love you give a child then the more that vital part of the brain develops."

Ms Gerhardt is writing a book to help the general public understand the science. She and the charity's four other highly-skilled counsellors have a down-to-earth approach to their work and make sure they do not bamboozle new parents with scientific facts and concepts. Neither do they preach and give practical advice or attempt to solve a parent's problem at one stroke.

"What babies are about is emotion. They are hugely affected by the state of their mother. The key thing is to pay attention to a baby's needs. If you are really depressed then it's hard to notice that a baby needs some cuddling. We help people recover from depression, sometimes post-natal, and support the parent and listen to them.

"It's hard when you've just become a parent and mothering is, for some, a very isolating experience. It can be overwhelming. We are highly-trained in counselling and help work out what the problem might be.

"They might have had a difficult birth, may be a premature baby or may be a mother might be finding it hard to adjust from being in the workplace to spending all her time at home.

"They might not even like their baby very much. There are so many different situations but we are here to listen and help where we can. Most of the people we see are mothers, but we see some fathers and also whole families, when necessary," Ms Gerhardt says.

The charity is supporting ten parents in the city but plans are now under way to take on three more counsellors following the announcement of the Lottery grant.

Oxpip's service is free but parents are asked to make a donation if they can afford it. Oxpip has strong links with the Rose Hill-Littlemore Sure Start family centre.

A fundraising concert for the charity is taking place at the Holywell Music Room, in Holywell Street, this Sunday, starting at 8pm. For tickets call 01865 862995.

For more information about Oxpip, call 01865 760547.

Archive Home